Dear Diary
by LittleLeopardess
Summary: It's really fluffy. It's more of a personal thought from Hermione in a sense. There's like one cuss word in there, sorry lol. Hermione/Snape pairing and an underline of Hermione/Ron.


**I do not own any of these characters! They belong to the lovely J.K. Rowling! The pairing is truly Hermione/Snape with an underline of Hermione/Ron. I did this for a challenge by Pinky Green :) I was instantly inspired. I hope you all enjoy..its really fluffy and short. And its a one-shot.**

* * *

Hermione Granger sat in study hall one day. She _knew_ she should be studying…but she just couldn't keep her mind off of two major men in her life.

_Well,_ She scoffed in her mind. _One is more like a boy._

Her best friend Harry Potter had given her a beautiful crème colored journal for this past Christmas. She finally decided to put it to use.

Flipping open the first page Hermione started to write.

_Dear Diary,_

_It's January 6th and it's a Wednesday. My name is Hermione Granger and I got this from a very dear friend, Harry Potter._

_I am in my fifth year of school at Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry. I have liked one my best mates, Ronald Weasley, for years now. But recently…recently I have started to rather fancy my Potions Professor._

_I really can't say why…I just do. Maybe it's the sad look in his eyes. Definitely the depth of his knowledge excites me so. I love the cool concentrated look on his face when he's brewing a potion for the class._

_Oh and how he can be mean sometimes! But I just…It's so silly! I can't stop thinking about him if I'm not actively thinking about something else._

_Well Diary, study hall is over. I'll write later, I promise._

_-H.G._

* * *

Later that night Hermione lie in bed. She eyed her Diary from time to time as she read an Ancient Runes textbook.

"I have to start…" Her train of thought drifted as Ginny Weasley walked in with her flaming red hair bouncing with every step. "Hey 'Mione." Ginny said and sat down on Hermione's bed.

"Would you fancy coming down and playing Wizards Chess with Ron, Harry and I?" Hermione smiled. "It's such a vile game…but I guess so." Ginny smiled. "Alright! Coming?" Ginny stood up. "Yeah, just give me a moment."

Ginny walked away from her and disappeared from the room. Hermione groaned and put her face in her hands. She sighed. "I'll get back to you later Diary, I promise."

* * *

The next day Hermione sat in Potions class. Ron was driving her mad. They weren't even dating and he was completely upset because she was a little bit spacey. Wasn't she entitled to being spacey once in a while? Ron should be able to know this stuff all on his own!

Harry gently patted her back. "It'll be okay 'Mione." He said to her and went back to his potion. She rolled her chocolate brown eyes and tied back her bushy brown hair with a ponytail.

Quickly Hermione decided to take out her journal and jot down an idea.

_Diary, Jan 7th,_

_Quick thought._

_Make a list later between Potions Professor and Ronald Weasley._

_-H.G._

She smiled to herself as she went back to making her potion. Hermione stayed slightly dreamy eyed as she watched Professor Snape out of the corner of her eye.

* * *

_Dear Diary, Jan 7th,_

_Continuing on my earlier thought here's a start to my list._

_What's better about Severus Snape over Ronald Weasley? With Severus, I swear that my stomach would just explode from all these butterflies._

_When I think of Ron I think… I hate big trucks, loud cars, overdue books, unreturned smiles, empty tissue boxes, scratchy throats and the way he makes me feel._

_-H.G._

* * *

_Dear Diary, Jan 10th,_

_I find myself daydreaming about Professor Snape more and more._

_In my fantasy I find myself staying late in Potions so that I can ask him some question about a love potion…He'll roll his eyes at me and grimace as he says, "Miss Granger, why are you still here?" I know my heart will race as I make my way up to his desk. I'll shyly ask him about how to properly make a love potion. I know he'll reply, "Education is an admirable thing, but it is well to remember from time to time that nothing that is worth knowing can be taught."_

_I'll nod and give him some excuse…"But Professor I just don't want to get it wrong you see…" He'll give me a questioning look and raise his eyebrows. I'll shiver inside because that look makes my heart skip a beat._

_He'll confide in me that there are some hurts that you never completely get over. And you think time will diminish their presence and to a degree…it does. But it still hurt because well…hurt hurts._

_And then he'll whisper, "I just need someone to tell me everything will be okay. I need to believe that, it is all I have."_

_And I know it all will fall, fall right into place. And I know falling in love should be more like Polaroid's: instant. But I'll tell him to hold me tight and that the best kind of love is when you don't expect anything at all….._

_-H.G._

* * *

"Hermione, will you help me with this?" Ronald Weasley sat across from her in the Gryffindor Common room. The two of them plus Harry were finishing up their Charms homework.

Hermione already had two scrolls worth of parchment about how to charm water into another liquid.

"Mmm, what do you need?" she said and looked over his writing. He was only half way done with one scroll. "Well this is wrong, and this…and this…" Hermione trailed off as she fixed his work.

He smiled at her. "Thanks." Harry watched their exchange. He wondered when Hermione started to think less of Ron romantically. It was the way she looked at him that was different. He shrugged his shoulders and went back to work.

* * *

_Dear Diary, Jan 28th,_

_There's been so much more to study this year! And we have this different professor…I didn't mention her before because well, sad to say boys have just been on my mind! I feel like such a little schoolgirl._

_Anyway her name is Dolores Umbridge. She is absolutely vile! She wont let us use wands and isn't teaching us anything about Defense Against the Dark Arts!_

_I can't say too much about what Harry, Ron and I are doing about this in case this falls into the wrong hands. (It'd be horrible enough if someone read this!)_

_I really find myself from time to time not finding Ron as any sort of Romantic Interest…sometimes I see Harry looking at me with his deep emerald green eyes with a knowing look in them._

_Ron is so dim witted and Harry doesn't seem to miss a thing with me._

_-H.G._

* * *

_Dear Diary, Feb 14th,_

_Sorry it has been quite a while since my last entry. I have been so busy lately! With "meetings" (What I can't really talk about), studying and homework I have been swamped!_

_I have made an effort to write in this today since its Valentines Day. Ron and I had a row about it because he wanted to be my Valentine. I didn't want to be his._

_It really hit me today how much I have changed with my thoughts about Ron._

_I wonder why I daydream about Severus Snape. It's silly because when you're dreaming with a broken heart, the giving up is the hardest part. Maybe I'm not trying as hard as I should to make this work with Ron (even though we're not technically together…) because of my silly fantasies._

_But then Ron yells at me about how horrible I am. About I'm just brains and I have no heart. He told me today that, "You can't just drop something and expect it to be all fine and normal, the very least is that you broke it."_

_Well maybe I did! But you know what? It's time to move on._

_You can spend minutes, hours, days, weeks or even months over-analyzing a situation (God knows I have!); trying to put the pieces together, justifying what could've, would've happened…or you can just leave the pieces on the floor and move the fuck on._

_Excuse my language Diary, but this is just…he is so infuriating! I cared deeply for Ron! For four years now and all he has done is brake my heart, time and time again. No one gets tired of loving, you know? But everyone gets tired of waiting, assuming, hearing promises, saying sorry and all the hurting._

_And maybe I'm just done! I don't want to wait anymore. I don't want the promises, the waiting or the assuming._

_My mom says that there will always be people you can't believe you were friends with, guys you can't believe you liked and people you can't believe you lived without. Maybe Ron is one of those people?_

_Diary, I'm too young to feel this old._

_-H.G._

* * *

Hermione found herself paired with Neville Longbottom in the next Potions Class she had.

Snape stared at her all through out the class. He was wondering why she always gave him these small smiles and spacey looks. She seemed to make more of an effort with her work then normal, if possible.

He swept his eyes over the class and decided to torment Harry Potter and Ronald Weasley for a while.

Hermione grinned maliciously as Professor Snape took five points from Ron for a snide comment. "What has gotten into you?" Neville asked her. She sighed. "Sorry Neville, Ron just really hurt my feelings." Neville shrugged. "Is it horrible I want to see him squirm a little?"

Neville chuckled quietly, trying not to attract Snapes attention. "I can't say I blame you but maybe you should think about not doing that in this class."

"Mr. Longbottom and Miss Granger, be quiet and get back to work." Snapes voice flowed down Hermione's spine and made her shiver slightly. Neville gave her an odd look. "Chilly." She mouth to him and went back to daydreaming.

* * *

_Dear Diary, Feb 22nd,_

_Today in potions was good. I finished my potion well in time to daydream some while I helped Neville Longbottom with his potion. I wish Neville had some more grace with Potions so I could have properly stared at Severus Snape instead of helping him. But Neville is so nice, so I guess it's alright._

_You know, when it works, love is pretty amazing. It's not overrated. There's a reason for all those songs. I wish I knew exactly what love was though. My mind tells me to give up, but my heart wont let me._

_If I could I'd tell Severus, "Three words. Eight letters. Say it and I'm yours." But only here, in my Diary and in my mind, will that ever be a reality._

_I want to tell him, "I want to run away with you and never look back." Or that "I have to make myself not want you, otherwise you're all I think about."_

_And this is so silly! I doubt he even gives me a second thought. I'm just "Miss Granger" to him. Just a silly girl in his class. And a muggle nonetheless…._

_You know Diary, just because I'm happy doesn't mean I have to smile. Just because I smile doesn't mean I'm happy. Does that make sense? I wonder if Harry can see it. He seems to see a lot without actually saying anything._

_Maybe I'll talk to him about it._

_-H.G._

* * *

"Harry?" Hermione stood in front of him as he sat in front of the fire in the Gryffindor Common Room. He flicked his gaze up to her. She looked nervous. "Yeah 'Mione? Are you okay?"

She gave him a distracted nod. "Would you go on a walk with me? I need to talk to someone." Harry was confused but he stood up and nodded. "Alright, lets go." Harry gently put a hand on her shoulder as they walked out together.

Ron sat on the opposite side of the room, glaring at the two.

Once outside Hermione let out a big sigh. "Harry, hypothetically, if you liked someone but you knew you couldn't have them, would you find it horrible if it affected other aspects of your life?"

Harry shrugged. "Well, what aspects are you talking about?"

Hermione bit her lip. "Like relationships." She mumbled. "Do you fancy someone else?" A blush crept into her cheeks. "Maybe. But it can't ever be. I put so much thought into it though. I just can't help it."

Hermione looked to the side as they walked through the castle. It would soon be curfew and they'd have to go back.

"So its more of a fiction romance in a sense? Like in a storybook?" Hermione looked over at him with an eyebrow raised. _Just like Snape._ Harry mused. He pushed the thought away.

"Well, I guess you could say that." She mumbled after a moment. "Well 'Mione, I don't think you should live in a fantasy. Either you need to go after this fellow or move on. Fantasy isn't reality and we need to keep a foot in reality always."

Hermione sighed and suddenly threw her arms around him. Harry pulled her close for a tight hug.

"You know Harry, sometimes I think you can read me better then anyone else." Harry chuckled. "I should be able to 'Mione, I'm your best friend." She smiled up at him brilliantly. They walked back to the Common Room arm in arm and talked about nothing in particular.

* * *

_Dear Diary, Feb 23rd,_

_Just a quick thought…_

_The trouble with fiction is that it makes too much sense. Reality never makes sense._

_-H.G._

* * *

The rest of the school year passed by ridiculously quick. Hermione wrote of her growing frustrations with school. How the Ministry was dealing with these hard times poorly.

She spoke fondly of Harry and their growing friendship as her friendship with Ron was non-existent. She mused over Harry and Cho's relationship and wondered where Dumbledore was.

Her "meetings" were no more, but she fiercely missed them. She wrote down dreams she had about a mystery man but couldn't ever see his face.

At their exams she was delighted when Fred and George Weasley had set off fireworks. She laughed in her entries about the other Professors not helping Umbridge clean up the mess and how Umbridge couldn't figure out how to even clean it!

Once in a while she'd slip and talk about Severus Snape. She told herself she wouldn't write about him, but of course it was a lie. Both to herself and her Diary.

* * *

On the last day of classes Hermione sat in Potions and wrote in her Diary. It was the last page in it, amazingly enough.

_Dear Diary,_

_It's the last day of this year. Next year will be even crazier. Or at least I have a hunch it will be._

_You know, I know I tried not to talk about Severus but I think the hardest part about waiting is not knowing whether you're waiting for anything at all._

_Even if Severus could or would ever fancy me, it would still be a year or two yet and even then I'm still his student. Maybe this summer I can put this notion to bed._

_Thank you Diary for being there for me all year. It means quite a lot even if you are just a Diary._

_Well I don't know where I'll go now and I don't really care who follows me there, but I'll burn every bridge that I cross and find some beautiful place to get lost. (Quite catchy isn't it? I rather liked it when I read it.)_

_Lots of love Diary, xoxo_

_-H.G._

* * *

Only when she was on the Hogwarts Train home did Hermione Granger realize she had left her Diary back up at the castle. And she realized she left it in the worst place possible. Professor Snape's classroom. Her cheeks flushed and she hid her face and hoped that it went unnoticed.

* * *

Back up at the castle Severus Snape sat in his classroom in the Dungeons. It felt wonderful to finally have some peace and quiet from the school year.

His eyes wandered around his class. He saw a crème colored journal sitting on top of a desk. Waving his wand he summoned it to him. "Maybe just a little read to see who owns it." He said to himself as he flipped it open to the first page.

His mouth almost dropped as he read the first entry. He knew he should put it down and owl it to her but he was fascinated by what he read.

By the time he was done with it he finally understood her small smiles and spacey looks this year. He was rather flattered that she would think of him in such a way, though he'd never say it.

Before he left Hogwarts for the summer he visited the Owlery with a handwritten letter to Hermione Granger. He also had the Diary carefully wrapped in a brown package.

* * *

A week later Hermione sat at the dinner table with her parents. She had missed them so much. They all were talking happily about what had gone on this past year.

A gently tap on the window had Hermione turning her head. She saw a beautiful brown owl there waiting to bet let in. Quickly she excused herself and got up to open the window. The owl hooted softly at her as she petted it and untied the letter and package from it.

"Hermione" Is all that was scribbled on top of the package. "Who's writing is that…?" She wondered as she walked up to her room.

She gingerly opened the package to find her Diary sitting there before her eyes. Her heart pounded in her chest as she picked up the letter attached to it. "Who found this?" She wondered as she opened the letter.

_"Miss Granger,_

_I found this in my classroom the day all the students left for home. I assure you I only meant to look at this to see whom it belonged to but I couldn't help reading this._

_I sincerely apologize for doing so. You're fascination with me is quite unhealthy. I am an old git who no one could love._

_However, if you still feel this way a year or two down the line, who knows what can happen._

_Hermione Granger, love is endless and you'll find it in the least likely places._

_Professor Severus Snape."_

Hermione laughed hysterically with tears in her eyes. She couldn't believe what she read. She quickly found some scotch tape and taped the letter into the back of her Diary. She smiled and hugged the Diary to herself.

Next year really would be a whole new year.


End file.
